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osamu "burnt black cat" dazai ([personal profile] proposed) wrote in [personal profile] savetheweak 2024-11-15 09:31 am (UTC)

[ He does think to press the other. He wants to hear what Fortune is, but in the end it's the same as always; Odasaku speaks, and Dazai speaks more. That's why they can interact like this.

Odasaku can listen to him, and Dazai can watch him - can listen to him, can do so much more, as only Dazai can, and so they can understand each other. ]


"Fortune" is what can take your heart away, and is what can replace it... "Fortune" is what can erase who you were, that which can make you afresh... It can do all of that. It is a force of nature, like lightning or a hurricane, yet you can never catch it except for but a moment...

[ He exhales softly, ]

It's an age old riddle, isn't it? Ah, it's so generic that it bores me... It is "time." It is "time," because if you remove those years, those nightmares of years of only seeing human suffering will disappear; he can be reborn at the end because he has forgotten the loss of his father and will never know it again... Isn't that better?

[ But Dazai's frown deepens as he folds his arms, his eyes closing as his chin tilts down. There's this uncertain look, like he truly does not know what is the better option, before his eyes flutter open and he looks back to Odasaku.]

"Fortune" is as simple as "ignorance," wouldn't you say? Or at least, "time."

[ Ignorance is bliss, or so the saying goes, but that's not quite what Dazai means either - it's something more nebulous than that. It's ignorance of the horrors of the world. It's ignorance of everything save what's important. Those personal secrets, those lost loves, everything that one can hold near and dear.

Everything that time claims with the same proficiency as the Grim Reaper's scythe.

And so "Fortune" must be time itself. That desire to not only be young, but dumb and curious, interested in only other men.

Time, but just a bit more. ]

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